People Told Us Their Therapist’s Best Advice To Them

Not too long ago, I posted this question in a Mental Health Awareness Support Group on a social media forum. It is a private group, so only a few people get access to it. Luckily, I did and that was probably the best thing that happened to me. Not only do I learn a lot from the discussions occurring in it but, I’ve also had some of my burning questions answered by experts and common people, alike. Recently, I asked them to tell me the best advice their therapist ever gave them and the answers are… stimulating!

Read Part I of this series here.

Read along to find out what people had to say.

1. I’m a people pleaser. I had to learn to think this thought when someone asked me to do something for them: “I do not have to set myself on fire to keep you warm.” Suddenly, it was easy for me to politely say, “No, that isn’t going to work for me.”
2. That terrible thing you are most afraid of probably isn’t going to happen, but even if it does you will deal with it.
3. You can’t change some people but you change your reaction to them.
4. Not mine but great advice I try to live by. Run the dishwasher twice if the dishes didn’t come out clean the first time. That means, stop sticking to notions of how things should be and do it the way it works for you. If faced with two about equal options, choose the easy one.
5. It’s all about perception. Try perceiving the situation from the other’s point of view and it might be radically different
6. Communicate openly without fear.
7. Think of good things when you’re upset or angry.
8. Write down your thoughts. Make a habit of writing.
9. Not to talk negatively about yourself. Uplift yourself with good thoughts and words.
10. Love yourself.
11. Always be mindful whenever you’re eating junk food; is it because you really want to eat it or is it an act of rebellion.
12. You are a whole cake. Men are just a cherry on top.
13. There’s a difference between enabling and empathizing with people. You can be there with them in their pain but don’t try to fix it for them because everyone needs to fix it by themselves.
14. Sometimes people treat you terribly because they’re mentally ill themselves and that’s NOT your fault.
15. Is that how you feel or are you internalizing other people’s views? Differentiate between what you think/ say and what others say about you.
16. Keep the comments you hear neck up. Don’t let them get to your heart.
17. Stop punishing yourself for something you didn’t do
18. Life is like a battlefield, all arrows your way, you have a choice to either stand still or pickup those arrows and fight back.
19. You always have a choice. There is always an alternate.
20. It’s okay for you not to know. And it’s okay for them not to have the answers either.
21. Write it down.
22. “Why do you feel that you can never get what you truly want? Why do you feel that it’s impossible to achieve what you are seeking? Until you don’t let it know what you truly want, how will the universe send it towards you? So always remember, be very loud about what you want, and never believe that you cannot get it.”
23. Do your best every day, but remember that your best is not the same every day.
24. No one is going to recover for you. All of the medication of the world won’t help you if you don’t do the work to get better and change your habits and your life, only you can do that.
25. You’d never be okay with someone talking to you the way you talk to yourself.
26. That some anxious thoughts actually are valid (it’s not a cognitive distortion if there is evidence that it really is true or very likely) and once you know that you can focus on other ways to cope with the anxiety itself instead of beating yourself up about not being able to change those thoughts.
27. Get angry.
28. Even small steps are big steps in the right direction
29. When talking to her about my anxieties regarding having my own children and my husband’s anxieties she told me “Remember. Stupider people than you have figured this out.”
30. The actions and reactions of others are a reflection of themselves, not me (in reference to an abusive childhood and abusive romantic relationships)
31. That I have unrealistic expectations of what I should accomplish in my life and adjusting my expectations will make it much easier for me to be accomplished.
32. Acceptance is not approval.

Liked what you read so far? What is the best advice that your therapist ever gave you? Tell us in the comments.

Interested to know about COVID-19 mental health resources? Click here.