What are Coping Mechanisms??
Coping mechanisms are strategic techniques that a person employs to combat stress or any other harmful emotion. Excellent and not to mention healthy coping mechanisms include workout or listening to songs. However, there are also negative coping mechanisms omnipresent. Furthermore, some people do not even know that they are unhealthy and continue to use them. Moreover, these coping techniques do more damage than repair. To give you a better understanding, we will count down a few prominent and unhealthy coping mechanisms you should try to stay far away from.
Enforced Happiness
This stems from the popular phrase “good vibes only”. Positivity has become an essential aspect of our pop culture. Also, there’s nothing wrong with having a positive mentality. However, be sure to evade “toxic positivity”. Whereas positivity comes from a place of happiness and joy, toxic positivity is rooted in denial and neglect. For example, people deny that they are not feeling well and put on a ‘happy face’ for others. This is not a good idea. I know it seems more realistic than having people call you weak but you’re not helping yourself.
It’s okay not to be strong all the time and sometimes you need to be truthful to yourself; admit that you’re unhappy or anxious. Nobody is going to judge. We all have bad days and for some of us, those days extend to weeks or even months. It’s totally fine. Additionally, I would suggest that we remove some toxic positivity phrases from our vocabulary. I have shortlisted a few sentences below:
1. Don’t think about it. Be happy.
2. Everything will be fine. Don’t stress.
3. Look at me. If I can do it so can you!
4. It could be worse.
5. Stop being so negative all the time. Be more positive!
The most important thing to remember at all times is that positive and negative emotions are a part of being human. You need both to survive. Don’t repress your sadness or hurt as you are just causing yourself more damage.
Isolation as a Coping Mechanism
It is often said that isolation is the most severe punishment for criminals. Why? Because as humans, we have an innate need to feel loved and socialize with others. Social isolation is an unhealthy habit. Furthermore, you can learn a lot from people around you. For me, watching my siblings play is better than T.V. Therefore, isolating yourself from others is not something you should do. Let yourself be open to others and find people who fulfill your needs. In fact, when you have meaningful discussions with others, you grow emotionally and mentally. However, if you feel stressed by social events, try to something with a very close friend. Just don’t spend too much time all by yourself!
Romanticizing the Past
Unfortunately, I feel like most of us utilize this mechanism. I know I have fallen prey to it from time to time. But, that’s the thing about psychology. We learn about ourselves and why we do what we do. And then we use that knowledge to improve ourselves physically, mentally, and emotionally. Most of us regard the past as a beautiful time. Honestly, the only time we weren’t so stressed out and enjoyed every single minute of it. With such an appealing memory, it’s hard not to think about it again and again. Especially if the present is not looking so hot! But, we all have to admit a sad truth. No matter how hard we try, we cannot resurrect the past.
In fact, things happened and will continue to happen. However, the past cannot be repeated. So, you need to abstain from daydreaming about all the time. Moreover, living in a daydream could blind you to new opportunities. Consequently, the best thing to do is try to analyze what was it about your past that made it so appealing. Once you’ve figured that out, try to see if there’s a chance that you could infuse that aspect into your present. Struggle to get out of these unhealthy coping mechanisms. It might require some effort but it’s totally worth it!
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Currently, I am a student of Fatima Jinnah Women University. With a burning passion for psychology, words, and dreams, I decided to abandon medical studies for humanities. These days, when I’m not listening to ballads, watching movies, or sitting down with a good novel, I am rigorously studying Hangul (Korean language) to satisfy my obsession for BTS and K dramas. I’m a thinking introvert and INFJ personality. Therefore, I like ‘me time’. My articles typically resonate with psychological well-being advice.