“If a married man flirts a little, it’s okay!” Asma Abbas

"If a married man flirts a little, it's okay!" Asma Abbas

In an open discussion with Neo TV host Wasi Shahi on his show Zabardast, performer and producer Asma Abbas—who is also the second wife of a married man—shared her unconventional ideas on marriage, stating that there is nothing wrong with a little bit of “minor flirting.”

She reminded the audience, “My husband already had a wife when we got married.” “I think it’s okay for a man to talk to another woman as long as you know he’s the father of your kids and will eventually return home.” Someone shouldn’t be choked to death.

Asma’s beliefs stand in sharp contrast to her rigid upbringing, in which she was forbidden from leaving the house after dark along with her four sisters. Bushra Ansari, the well-known comedian and TV veteran’s sister, told Asma about how their late father, writer Ahmed Bashir, forbade any of his four daughters from having a career in show business.

Asma said, “He was a very conservative man.” “Our father consistently attempted to dissuade us from pursuing our goals. Even though we were loved by him, we were not permitted to leave the house after Maghrib.

Asma said that societal perceptions about the cinema and television industries themselves had a role in the issue.

She remarked, “I don’t understand why people can’t respect showbiz the way they respect bankers, doctors, and teachers.” Nobody exerts as much effort as we do. We even work fourteen hours a day at times! Although everyone in a profession faces challenges, others believe that ours is the only one that undermines society.

Asma regretted that despite being well-known in the TV business, her sister Bushra had to endure their father’s rigorous upbringing at first and wasn’t given the opportunity to grow up until she married. Asma claims that although Bushra was permitted to act like a child, their father was not pleased with her entering the field as an adult.

Asma said, “Bushra Api was bursting with talent.” She was a completely different person. Why would you make such an attempt to stop a child?

Asma is convinced that it was only after meeting her husband Iqbal Ansari that her sister was able to escape the constraints of their father’s laws.

Asma brought up the fact that Bushra Api has always been referred to by everyone as Bushra Ansari rather as Bushra Bashir because she didn’t begin working until she married her husband.

Although Zara Noor Abbas was also raised by a stern father who forbade her from acting in school plays, Asma was determined that her daughter Zara did not experience the same kind of suffering.

Asma questioned, “Why doesn’t our society fulfil the dreams of their daughters?” remembering that Zara had to keep her acting career in school a secret from her father. Asma served as an example of the effects of such upbringing when Zara ran away to America and hurried into an unsuccessful marriage in the hopes of launching a film career there.

Asma said, “And we all know what happened then,” alluding to Zara’s forced return home following the breakdown of her marriage.

Asma is happy that Zara’s situation has improved and that she may now pursue her goals and have a prosperous career.

Asma said, “We should give advice instead of using the word permission when dealing with children.” “A woman can achieve anything she wants when she has a strong financial position.”

Given her strong beliefs about giving girls and women the freedom to grow up and find their feet, it is not surprising that Asma has broken away from her rigid upbringing and created new opportunities for the coming generation to thrive in.