What is addiction?
According to the American Society of Addiction Medicine:
Addiction is a primary, chronic disease of brain reward, motivation, memory, and related circuitry. Dysfunction in these circuits leads to characteristic biological, psychological, social, and spiritual manifestations. This is reflected in an individual pathologically pursuing reward and/or relief by substance use and other behaviors. Addiction is characterized by the inability to consistently abstain, impairment in behavioral control, craving and diminished recognition of significant problems with one’s behaviors and interpersonal relationships, and a dysfunctional emotional response. Pornography falls under the umbrella of addiction.
Pornography: Is It really Addictive?
For many of us, the term pornography brings up negative images — the pedophile, the cheater, and for some, even the rapist. Everything sex-related gets thrown in with the word pornography — child porn, rape porn, bestiality, consensual sex. Current research tells us that 12 percent of today’s websites are pornographic, 25 percent of all search engine results are porn-related and 35 percent of all downloads show sexualized imagery. Approximately one-third of all internet pornography users are women, up from 14 percent in 2003.1 Pornography has been called the Triple-A Engine. It is easily accessible, most affordable, and usually anonymous.
Can all these viewers be pedophiles, cheaters, and rapists? Hardly. A lot of people view pornography.
What is porn addiction?
Addiction comes in many forms. While addiction to pornography may on the surface appear harmless to some, it has the ability to seriously damage a sufferer’s ability to create meaningful relationships or maintain ongoing relationships with friends and loved ones. The growth and spread of high-speed internet make this addiction a growing problem.
What does it mean to be addicted to pornography?
Cambridge University researchers found that compulsive porn users react to pornography cues in the same way that drug addicts react to drug cues. In one Cambridge study 2, researchers found strong evidence of sensitization in compulsive pornography users. Sensitization is the hyperreactivity to cues that lead to craving use and is considered to be the core addiction-related brain change. Other researchers are finding similar results. The brain reacts to compulsive pornography use just as it reacts to drug cues. Yes, pornography can be addictive.
Pornography addiction exists
Compulsive viewing can become like a ball and chain. Viewers may want to do it but don’t enjoy it much anymore and sometimes they don’t even want to do it but feel compelled to view. They continue to view it in spite of many negative consequences. While not everyone who views pornography becomes addicted, for some viewing pornography is very problematic. People have lost their jobs due to viewing on the job and then go to another job and continue viewing on the job there. For some, the fantasy world of erotica and porn becomes so real that they come to believe the people in the videos or still pictures love them. Some people’s lives come to revolve around porn viewing. They become preoccupied with when the next opportunity will be. They wake up. View porn. During the break at work, they view porn on their smartphone. Then there’s more porn later in the day. Some isolate themselves in their homes to the point where most of their life is one of fantasy with few or no real-world relationships. This can happen to anyone.
Identifying an addiction
Ask yourself these questions:
Have you become increasingly withdrawn, avoiding family and friends while spending an unusual amount of time viewing pornography online?
- Are you increasingly secretive, trying to hide what you view online, and overreacting if your partner touches your phone?
- Are you feeling preoccupied with fantasy, sexualized thoughts, or preparatory activities?
- If you are in a relationship with a significant other, are you emotionally and mentally absent from the relationship, especially during sex?
- Do you feel trapped, that you have no choice whether to view like pornography has a hold over you and insists you have to?
- Do you deliberately limit social, occupational, or recreational opportunities in order to keep time open for finding and viewing pornography?
- Have you experienced unsuccessful efforts to stop, reduce, or control the behavior?
- Are you continuing to view pornography despite negative consequences such as loss of a job?
- Do you feel more frequent, more intense porn is required over time in order to get the desired result?
- Does viewing pornography take significant time away from your occupational, academic, domestic, or social obligations?
Mike Bickle says in his book, ‘The Seven Longings of the Human Heart’, Addiction wraps itself around a person, giving their natural appetites an artificial life of their own, while simultaneously short-circuiting their ability to function normally.
Let’s overlay this quote in a light specific to pornography addiction. “Pornography wraps itself around a person, giving their natural [sexual] appetites and artificial life of their own, while simultaneously short-circuiting their ability to function at a normal [sexual] level.”
Russell Brand, a well-known British comedian and talk show host who has been clean for 10 years makes this inciteful comment, “Drugs and alcohol are not my problems, the reality is my problem, drugs and alcohol are my solutions.”
It’s easy for us to separate ourselves from those who battle the ‘obvious’ or ‘harmful’ addictions like drugs, alcohol, and pornography. However, the truth is that at some level we all look for a bit of escapism or comfort. For some it’s as ‘harmless’ as the soap opera we watch week after week, going to the movies, working out at the gym, consuming alcohol or food.
In his statement, Brand exposes what’s at the heart of so many of us, that desire to ‘check out’ of life. This is the birthplace of addictions.
“Addiction wraps itself around a person, giving their natural appetites an artificial life of their own, while simultaneously short-circuiting their ability to function normally. Loss of control appears in everyone’s definition. Eventually, the substance or process once sought to fill the emotional void and bring pleasure becomes the slave-driver. It demands repetitive use.” (Melinda Fish, ‘I Can’t be an addict, I’m a Christian’)
ONLY BOYS LOOK AT PORN, RIGHT?
Although stereotypes typically pin porn addiction on boys, a surprising number of young girls are also exposed and find themselves pulled into viewing pornography.
In the earlier days of widespread Internet use by young girls, exposure to porn most often occurred through a pop-up ad that was innocently clicked or some curiosity that was carried out through a search engine. This conclusion is supported by a 2008 study titled, The Nature and Dynamics of Pornography Use Among Children, which surveyed more than 500 college students and explored pornography exposure before age 18. In this study, almost half of all surveyed girls (42.3 percent) said that they were not actively seeking out the images when they were exposed.
Porn addiction effects on relationships
Pornography addiction can be painfully isolating. Typically, addicts can spend hours or even days with the internet or chosen medium, lost in images and experiences that cause real-life to lose its meaning. Pornography addiction, like so many others, also carries a heavy moral stigma. This means love and sex relationships are negatively affected too, often causing the addiction to intensify and become more problematic.
The Internet has revolutionized communication, especially among teen girls. But, the very media platform that helps us connect also has allowed the pornography industry to explode. Both guys and girls have so much explicit content right at their fingertips.
So, what’s the answer?
We need to know who we are and what’s available to us in terms of ‘reality’. God promises us the “abundant life”. It sounds great! Full of abundance and plenty. The thing is this: the Israelites had to go through the wilderness to get to their land of abundance.
Our PRIMARY battle is always in the mind. At the moment, as we pause, we need to ask, “God what lie have I accepted that is allowing this to tempt me and telling me I cannot survive my current reality without it when you have everything I need to get through this?” I can promise you it is most likely a lie about Him. When you are at home and you are bored or lonely and that little voice offers pornography as a way out, identify that option as a lie and ask God for his truth.
The truth is that God wants your freedom more than you do. He paid the ultimate price for it and is always setting you up for success. Freedom cost Him something; it will cost you something. Sink into His love and ‘stand firm’. You were born to win this war.
For more updates follow RangeInn. You can reach me at muqadasfatima@rangeinn.com for your valuable feedback.