According to the American Psychological Association, “Trauma is an emotional response to a terrible event”. It takes over anyone who’s been through an emotionally disturbing or life-threatening experience. Honestly, trauma cares for no one. Furthermore, trauma also isn’t something that only people who’ve been diagnosed with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) can have.
Living with trauma can affect you well after that event. And, it can play a big part in how you move forward in life. Additionally, the types of trauma and their range of effects are broad and different for everyone. But, signs and behaviors are common in most people with trauma, and when made aware of, can help determine what kind of trauma you have. And how it’s affecting YOU.
1. You’re Still Emotionally Affected
A clear sign you could be living with trauma is if a past traumatic event still takes a toll on you emotionally. It doesn’t matter how long ago it may have been. Determining if a traumatic experience is still affecting you can be seen through many different ways, and aren’t the same for everyone. Feelings tied to your trauma can be triggered by everyday conversations and places.
Moreover, the problem with continuing to be affected by a traumatizing event is that it can stand in your way of healing and recovery. This is especially true when your feelings are so strong, to the point where it almost feels as though you’re reliving the incident, making it even harder to handle and cope with.
2. You Avoid Certain Thoughts, Feelings, and Conversations
Avoidance is a natural reaction to trauma. So, what does this mean? It’s when you go out of your way to avoid certain thoughts, feelings, conversations tied to an unpleasant incident. Why? because you don’t know how to deal with them. Also, You might do this if you find recalling certain events overwhelming, or if you can’t bring yourself to talk about a traumatic experience or hear of any similar ones. Therefore, you realize that talking about and looking back on a traumatic event can be emotionally taxing.
As a result, your “flight” response, in the face of what your mind views as dangerous, kicks in, causing you to steer clear of these unwanted and uncomfortable triggers. It’s important to know that avoiding your trauma is only a temporary solution that pushes away your thoughts and feelings at the moment but doesn’t guarantee they won’t pop up again. Furthermore, avoidance can also lead to unhealthy coping mechanisms, like substance abuse and excessive drinking.
3. Disconnect From Trauma
Even if your traumatic experiences may seem unique to only you, there are likely people out there who’ve also been through similar experiences they could use to empathize with you. According to the National Council for Mental Wellbeing, “70% of adults in the U.S. have experienced some type of traumatic event at least once in their lives”.
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However, because your traumatic experiences typically aren’t common, everyday incidents, it can be unlikely to know someone who can relate. This can make it hard for you to find someone able to empathize and fully understand what you went through. As a result, you might feel disconnected from others because of your experiences. And trauma makes you feel misunderstood, different, or singled out. Also, feeling disconnected from others can even lead to suppressing your emotions, to avoid any unwanted reactions from people who may not understand why you feel the way you feel.
4. Closed Off and Distant
Because traumatic events are emotionally and mentally damaging, they can be hard to talk about. If you find this to be true, avoiding social interaction, or telling family and friends you’re “fine” when they ask you what’s wrong, might sound familiar. Yeah. Same here! Even when others are willing to listen and talk to you about how you’re feeling, it can still be hard to take them up on their offer due to fear of how they might react.
Furthermore, isolating yourself and being unable to open up can make you feel like you’re drowning in your thoughts and feelings alone. As a result, this can create distance and strain in your relationships, and can also make maintaining close relationships difficult.
5. Negative Shifts in Personality and Thinking Due to Trauma
Well, it can’t be worse, right? Trauma can also have an impact on your overall personality and ways of thinking. These effects can range from a decrease in self-esteem to a pessimistic view of people. Because your trauma may have forced you to see the “ugly” side of life or human behavior, you might have developed a cynical outlook on life as a result. This can make you believe that most people have harmful intentions.
So, your trauma may also cause you to be more on guard; you may find it harder to trust people. Additionally, your ability to form new relationships can also be impacted by trauma. You avoid being close to others.
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Currently, I am a student of Fatima Jinnah Women University. With a burning passion for psychology, words, and dreams, I decided to abandon medical studies for humanities. These days, when I’m not listening to ballads, watching movies, or sitting down with a good novel, I am rigorously studying Hangul (Korean language) to satisfy my obsession for BTS and K dramas. I’m a thinking introvert and INFJ personality. Therefore, I like ‘me time’. My articles typically resonate with psychological well-being advice.