Magic Words-Know Exactly What to Say
What is effective communication? Are you any good at it? If the answer is no, don’t be disheartened. Many of us face similar issues when it comes to saying exactly what we mean. Words don’t come that easily to us. But, guess what? That’s completely fine. M. Phil Jones compiled a dictionary of ‘magic words’.These words have the power to get your message across. Although they are mostly for business purposes, one can inculcate them into daily conversations for effective communication. So, let’s hit the books. That’s where the knowledge is!
Exactly What to Say: The Magic Words for Influence and Impact
Scott Stratten, the President of UnMarketing Inc., described Jones’ book as “a dictionary of business success language. Right from page one, you’re given the strategy to change the way you influence others”. Let’s do a priority check. Most of us want to be successful in all aspects of life. Whether it’s in our relationships or vocation, we want to be ‘the it person’. Did you know that effective communication solves 90 percent of all problems? It’s crazy but it works. Therefore, Jones helps us out by sharing magic words that have tremendous power when spoken at the right time.
At only 93 pages, it’s a worthwhile read. Jones lists twenty-three phrases that influence people and exemplify various situations. The book is easy to read and requires a curious mind. The content is distributed efficiently and no extra information, not even an extra word is present. Although I prefer everyone to read this entire book, I’ll provide a few key phrases that I have started using in my vocabulary to persuade people.
Just imagine-Magic Words
According to Jones, humans make decisions twice. First, they hypothetically see it in their mind. Secondly, they make the actual decision backed up by words and actions. This magic word ‘Just imagine’ allows people to see themselves doing something (that you want them to). If they can picture it chances are that they will also do it.
I’m guessing you haven’t got around to
Professionals utter these words when they are fearful that the other person has not done the task required of them. Let’s say that you are the group leader of a project. You have assigned deadlines for each member’s task. Now, it is time to see if they’ve done it or not. Instead of asking them if they’ve finished it, use a different approach. Use the magic words ‘I’m guessing you haven’t gotten around to doing your work?”
This will make you sound less accusative and more hopeful. The person will no longer be able to come at you with a mountain of excuses. They can simply answer yes or no. If they prove you wrong by saying “Actually no, I’ve done my work”—this profits both parties. We are inclined to feel better when we can prove someone wrong. Likewise, the other person has completed the tasks on time. Now that what’s I call effective communication!
You have three options-Magic Words
Perhaps, you’re a bit doubtful about this one. I mean, think about it. We, as humans, consider that our world is made of binaries. Yes or no? Girl or boy? Black or white? Arts or Sciences? But, this is why these magic words work so well! We surprise people by offering them a third alternative. When there are two options, a person might feel manipulated and pressurized into making a rash decision. With three, you are simply “putting it out there”. Furthermore, Jones elaborates, “Of those three options, what’s going to be easier for you?” Using this phrase, the other party feels like they’re in control and you are also benefiting from it.
Most people-Magic Words
Jones credits this phrase as “responsible for more of his negotiating success than any other single strategy ever employed in his businesses.” Let’s admit it. We all can be indecisive sometimes. Therefore, there needs to be something that makes people leave their hesitancy behind. Incoming the phrase ‘most people’. It’s human psychology that we like to make the same secure decisions as people before us. Perhaps, that’s why your parents want you to follow in their footsteps; as they know that you’ll get the same benefits they did, they encourage you.
As we know that there’s safety in numbers, we do the same thing as everyone else. We tend to hop onto the bandwagon. Again, this would explain why so many parents want their children to become doctors and engineers. So, the next time you want to persuade someone into doing something, tell them other people have done it before and liked it! That’s one guaranteed way to get things done.
How would you feel if?
Motivation is basically giving the public a reason to do something. Therefore, the best way to get something done is to motivate others towards its action. But, what makes people motivated? People do stuff “to avoid the loss or to acquire a potential gain”. Psychology also tells us that people try harder to avoid losses than to gain profits. But, before we think something is right, it must feel right.
Consequently, Jones proclaims that “By introducing a future scenario with the words, ‘How would you feel if…?’ you allow the other person to time travel to that moment and imagine the emotions that would be triggered at that point”. Then, the person relates these emotions as motivation. They become motivated to do that thing because of your future scenario reasoning.
The Takeaway
Of course, the magic words mentioned in this article are far from being conclusive. There are so many words and phrases that, when uttered at the right time, helps us get what we want. We become effective communicators and people value the words we speak. I highly recommend this book to business majors. However, anyone who wants to learn how to influence people should read this. You won’t regret it!
To read another article by me, click here.
Need help studying? Click here.
Currently, I am a student of Fatima Jinnah Women University. With a burning passion for psychology, words, and dreams, I decided to abandon medical studies for humanities. These days, when I’m not listening to ballads, watching movies, or sitting down with a good novel, I am rigorously studying Hangul (Korean language) to satisfy my obsession for BTS and K dramas. I’m a thinking introvert and INFJ personality. Therefore, I like ‘me time’. My articles typically resonate with psychological well-being advice.
